Those words (the subject line) actually popped out of my mouth yesterday while I was mid-rant to my husband. They weren’t directed toward him (even though I AM older than him). I was going on and on about an incident that occurred. Now that I’ve been thinking about it (it’s been over 24 hours, so I’m much calmer now) it really isn’t about the disrespect shown to me because I’m an “elder”. It was the disrespect shown to me … period.
See, if you are in my house, you are my guest. I will do whatever I deem necessary to ensure a comfortable, pleasant visit. That is the way I am, whether I like the person or don’t. Why would I be that way to someone I do not like? Because I respect the person who brought them. That wasn’t the case, yesterday. This person I actually liked but my reaction to the situation displays how much respect I have for the person who brought them. Instead of my typical reaction, I walked away.
It took everything within me to turn around and walk out my back door. I do not do well with being shown disrespect from those who I have welcomed into my home (and life). I have a few examples I’m willing to share: When my boss got within an inch of my face, screaming at me, I squared up my shoulders and yelled right back. When my eldest was a teenager, he made the mistake of calling me a bitch to my face and I slapped him, and when my youngest was a teenager and spoke to me the I was spoken to yesterday, I let him have it (vocally) with both barrels. I even stopped being friends with one of my oldest friends for a much smaller showing of disrespect than what was shown to me yesterday … in my own house.
So, why am I writing about this today? Because I’ve been thinking. 🙂 What does respect mean to me? Respect doesn’t mean I bow down to anyone because I respect them. It doesn’t mean that I follow anyone’s advice simply to show respect. It means that I have enough respect in myself to either show restraint in certain situations or to defend myself and those I love. Respect means that when you are in front of me, you will never know how much I like or dislike you (unless that is my intention). I do not demand respect from others, I expect it if that is what I have shown you.